[ It's only the cheek and she guesses it's coming, which is the only reason she manages not to flinch at his close he is. And she hates that response, that they've become this instead of the couple who clung to each for sanity and hope.
Settling into her chair, she takes note of the drink and smiles gratefully. ]
[ She pulls in a slightly shaking breath and lets it out slowly, her hands wrapping around the glass. Her thumbs stroke the surface slowly, the feeling of the pooling condensation helping to ground her a little. Keep her focus. ]
I love you too, Anakin. But I don't need you to do anything more for me than show me you can still be the man I fell in love with.
[ It hurts so much to say those words... because she's not sure that he can. At least she manages to keep most of the distress from showing in her expression. ]
It isn't going to be easy for either of us, because I'm sorry but this isn't something that can be fixed overnight.
I'm working on that and you're right, it can't be fixed overnight. [For the first time, he is giving himself space to sort things out. He isn't expecting an epiphany or a simple fix; he is expecting to regain his stability.]
You don't need to be scared of me. I would rather skewer myself than hurt you.
All of my stupid ideas about you and Obi-Wan are gone and I know the problem is with me. Watch me day by day and I promise I won't disappoint you.
[Part of this is showing her he has changed, but only part of it. The majority is him wanting to find himself again. He wants Vader to die; to cease to exist, but such a strong force isn't easy to suppress.]
[ Padmé releases the glass and pulls her hands back beneath the table, pressing them to her skirt. She's proud of him for realizing that she's right and this will take time. Even just a few months ago, she's not certain he would have been willing to say the same. It's real progress, as is everything else he tells her.
But none of it changes the fact that he did hurt her, and some part of her is still afraid of him. ]
I'll wait for you. I'll wait to see the man you become. [ Before she makes any decisions about their future and where she sees herself in it. Lifting her hands again, she sets them on the table between them, palms up. An offer that she hopes he'll accept. ]
[He is afraid of himself too - or at least the part that has become Vader. When he gives into that persona - that force - he stops feeling anything but pain, bitterness and endless anger. None of those emotions have any right to connect themselves to Anakin Skywalker - the man he should be.]
I don't want you to give up on me. [His eyes widen at the offer and gently, carefully, realizing the fragility of this moment, he touches her palms. The mechno-arm is nothing new to her, but he is especially cautious with it.] You're part of me. The very best part.
[ His hands in hers are so familiar and yet so strange. How long has it been since they held hands like this? Weeks? Months? She can't quite remember anymore. ]
I will always be part of you, no matter happens to us. You just have to hold on to that part.
[ And she hopes he does, truly. She would like nothing more than for them to find their way through this... but she can't make a promise she's not certain she'll be able to keep. ]
[Her hands are so delicate, but he knows their appearance hides the fact that she is one of the strongest people he knows.]
I'm doing my best. [He closes his eyes tightly.] I can't stop loving you and for that reason, I have to remember who I was; who I wanted to be all those years ago.
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Settling into her chair, she takes note of the drink and smiles gratefully. ]
Thank you, that was very sweet.
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I love you, Padmé. I wish I could do more for you - especially with me leaving for two weeks.
[The trip will be good for him, mentally and emotionally.]
This...pull...I feel...between the Light and the Dark...
I hope Obi-Wan can help me finally put it to rest.
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I love you too, Anakin. But I don't need you to do anything more for me than show me you can still be the man I fell in love with.
[ It hurts so much to say those words... because she's not sure that he can. At least she manages to keep most of the distress from showing in her expression. ]
It isn't going to be easy for either of us, because I'm sorry but this isn't something that can be fixed overnight.
no subject
You don't need to be scared of me. I would rather skewer myself than hurt you.
All of my stupid ideas about you and Obi-Wan are gone and I know the problem is with me. Watch me day by day and I promise I won't disappoint you.
[Part of this is showing her he has changed, but only part of it. The majority is him wanting to find himself again. He wants Vader to die; to cease to exist, but such a strong force isn't easy to suppress.]
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But none of it changes the fact that he did hurt her, and some part of her is still afraid of him. ]
I'll wait for you. I'll wait to see the man you become. [ Before she makes any decisions about their future and where she sees herself in it. Lifting her hands again, she sets them on the table between them, palms up. An offer that she hopes he'll accept. ]
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I don't want you to give up on me. [His eyes widen at the offer and gently, carefully, realizing the fragility of this moment, he touches her palms. The mechno-arm is nothing new to her, but he is especially cautious with it.] You're part of me. The very best part.
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I will always be part of you, no matter happens to us. You just have to hold on to that part.
[ And she hopes he does, truly. She would like nothing more than for them to find their way through this... but she can't make a promise she's not certain she'll be able to keep. ]
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I'm doing my best. [He closes his eyes tightly.] I can't stop loving you and for that reason, I have to remember who I was; who I wanted to be all those years ago.